Office Prank: Remote Control Inflatable Floating Shark
Have any of you guys seen the Air Swimmer Remote Control Inflatable Floating Shark
It is a best selling item on Amazon, which makes me wonder what people are doing with it? You have to fill it with helium and it stays filled for two weeks or so. And you control it with a remote control. Supposedly it can bounce right off any walls that it hits.
After thinking about it, I think this would a great gag item for office pranks. Think about it – how awesome would it be to use the remote control to send the shark into some wanker’s cubicle at work? Hysterical, right?
If anyone buys this and tries it, be sure to let me know how it goes!
The Ultimate Guide To Sick Excuses – For Your Kindle
If you want to be a prepared slacker, and you have a Kindle, then you need the The Complete Slacker’s Official Guide To Being Sick Excuses: 55 Excuses To Get You Out Of Work Or School (Complete Slacker’s Official Guides)
This is the first official CompleteSlacker.com book for Kindle, so show us some love.
For the low, low price of just $0.99 you can have this book delivered to your Kindle instantly. And then you will always have a copy of the 55 best sick excuses ever. Yes, ever. Better yet, almost all of these excuses have been tested by me and proven to be effective ways to get out of work and still get paid. Booyah!
If you don’t want the sick excuses, stay tuned because we have more guides to be released soon.
A Slacker Will Find Anything To Do Other Than Work
A few weeks ago I got the most awesome email from a reader. He was short on words, but provided me with proof of what he’d been doing at work to avoid working. The best part was that he emailed me from his work email address. From this I could see that he is a Project Manager at a hospital. Man, I love Project Manager jobs. They are truly the best for slacking. If you have never been lucky enough to have one of these jobs, let me tell you how mine was…
I went to work every day and opened up MS Project and my web browser. My boss would come in to ask me how things were going on the project. I minimized the web and looked at MS Project to tell him what everyone else was doing. Then he left my office (yes, I had my own office with a door) and I played on the internet for the rest of the day. I often took 3 hour lunches because no one noticed. Every two weeks or so I did have to attend project meetings, but that just consisted of everyone on the project giving progress report updates. It was one of the best jobs ever. I was so sad when the project ended and my “services” were no longer needed.
Now, I’m assuming that the slacker that emailed me isn’t fortunate enough to have internet access. That blows. However, he seems to be doing just fine when it comes to slacking at work. Check out his artwork from MS Paint (yes, you can find ANYTHING to do in order to avoid working)
And, my personal favorite:
Rock on slacker Sean, you are awesome.
Slacker Tips #224: Fake Your Job References
When you make up that fake resume for your next job interview, coming up with some references can be a challenge.
For myself, I usually have friends play the part of a past boss or I get a throwaway phone number and take care of it on my own. I’ve also setup fake company websites to really make the fake company on my resume look real.
If you can’t do any of those things, someone out there wants to offer you a fake reference for a price.
The site is called CareerExcuse.com and it is not cheap.
It looks like the base package is $125 for set-up and $30 per month, with the first month due in advance. And prices go up from there.
In all seriousness, if you really need a job and it hinges on a good reference, I would pull the trigger on this. Assuming that you can’t take care of it on your own.
For me, I wouldn’t use this service because I can do all this on my own. However, if you don’t think you can do it on your own I say go for it.
The fact is that lying on your resume and using fake references isn’t illegal. That’s why those of us that know this always land sweet jobs.
Disclaimer: I am not affiliated in any way with CareerExcuse.com and discovered them through a MSN Money article.
USB Flash Drive Sale
I’ve said before that I think every slacker needs a USB flash drive. Well, I noticed earlier that you can get one real cheap.
The Toshiba 4 GB USB 2.0 Flash Drive
They are great for running games or an alternate web browser from on your work computer.
Being Sick Excuse #61: Bit By Stray Animal
Okay, so when I was younger, my brother got bit by a stray cat when he tried to pet it. The result of this? A trip to the doctor to get a shot in case the cat had rabies. Guess what? There are still stray animals that can bite you. And trip to get an anti-rabies shot can get you outta work for a half-day.
So, call into work at the time you would normally be leaving the house. (This is so it looks realistic.) Tell the boss that you think you need to go to the E.R. or something cause you tried to pet a cat that came up to you as you were leaving but it bit you. And what if it has rabies or something? Cause you’ve never seen it before and it just bit you and ran off.
For good measure before going into work after lunch, put a bandage on your hand where the cat bit you. It makes it look more realistic. Of course, you’ll have to wear it a couple of days to keep up the charade.
